I write like HP Lovecraft

It’s true. Really.

I write like
H. P. Lovecraft

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

The funny side of domestic violence

This blog hasn’t laughed so much since the Lord Meddlesome of Fey Green Slime Incident.

Con-Dem partnerships can be tricky……

Coalition partners resort to violence.

Liberal-Democrat councillor Christine James has been charged with assault and will appear in Weymouth Magistrate’s Court on September 9^th.

Feeling are running high amongst the tribal ground force. Passions inflamed as agendas are compromised. Who did she assault?

Her alleged victim is believed to be her husband of 19 years and Conservative Borough council colleague, Ian James.

Mr James is a champion of the Weymouth and Portland Domestic Violence and Abuse Forum and sits on the Community Safety Partnership…..

At a borough council meeting earlier this month, Christine James said that campaigners from the Friends of Weymouth Refuge for battered partners had ‘proven that a refuge like this is both relevant and needed’.

Respectful tug of the forelock to the mighty Al Jahom.

Ghandi and Martin Luther King as establishment patsies

How about this for a spectacularly stupid piece of historical revisionism?

You can’t argue with psychopaths.

Damn straight, Derrick.

Pinafore your thoughts

Yes, I know.

Mark Thomas is completely hatstand most of the time, but he and I do stand shoulder to shoulder on the question of freedom of assembly.

Here is his take on plod’s new £9m domestic extremist tracking programme….

Ed Balls in makeup and a Nazi uniform, staring at a bloke’s arse

I dunno, wherever do they dig up this stuff?

Apparently it’s from his salad days at Keble.

No Bullingdon Club references, please. That wouldn’t be fair.

Subcontinental email pest dept. Oh do leave me alone, will you please?

Karahi’s been clogging up my inbox again.

Two months ago he dispatched one of periodical email circulars about nothing of consequence, saying….

One day, people, social networking sites like Facebook and Twitter will just disappear without a trace. You heard it here first.

Well, no I didn’t, actually.

Excellent. I’m waiting expectantly for the dawn of that day.

In deciding whether to use Facebook, Twitter, Shitter or Mysolitarybedroomexistence, I only have to ask myself whether The Hoff would use it. Answer, yes, so it’s not for me.

And let’s face it, The Hoff has a more interesting life than most about which to broadcast snippets of ephemera to “friends” he’s never met, and probably never will.

“Fine. Chacun à son goût,” thought I. Personally I don’t use Twitter to divulge information about my personal life, but more as a tool for enticing visitors to this blog, but you’re welcome to your opinion.

Imagine my surprise, then, when this morning, the following paranoid screed arrives….

I noticed this morning that a suggested friend on Facebook….

Sorry?

….a suggested friend on Facebook….

That would be the Facebook that, two months ago, a team of Clydesdales on steroids wouldn’t have dragged you into signing up for, or another Facebook I don’t know about?

….was my landlady.

Now, normally when I have a look at suggested friends I’ve never heard of, we always have one or more friends in common; fair enough.

So I was wondering which friends the landlady shared. Answer: fuck all.

Now that’s just weird. Why would she appear as a suggested friend? I barely know her, don’t know anyone else who knows her, have no personal info on Facebook that would connect me to her, and when I checked her small list of friends I’d never heard of any of them.

Blimey, K. That’s a cosmic mystery and half, right there. Sounds like the CIA’s been reading your thoughts. I’d seriously consider a tin-foil helmet if I were you.

If only there was some way he didn’t absolutely, positively have to use Facebook.